Living with a black dog

Living with a black dog


Living with a black dog a guide for
partners carers and sufferers. What not to say or do. You may well be
right when you say “It’s all in your head!” but don’t say it,
leave that up to the professionals “Be a man!” this certainly doesn’t help, Especially if they are one already.
Depression is an illness, not a sign of weakness. Don’t be an
armchair general who gives unfounded advice and orders. Being thoughtful and kind
will never go amiss. Don’t try and jolly them along, it can often
make them feel worse. Don’t point out that there are people in
this world far worse off than them. It just adds to their feelings of guilt
and hopelessness. Good things to say and do. Be sensitive
about how you approach the subject; a lot of people aren’t used to talking about
their mental health, or lack of it. Crossing that line
simply means you care. Try not talking Instead grow your ears and open your
heart Really being there for someone without
opinion or judgment is one of the best gifts you can ever give. Encourage them to seek a professional
opinion. An offer to help find a good doctor, make an appointment and even going with
them, can be hugely beneficial Encourage any former regular exercise Fitness robs the dog with its power. Help
them develop a strategy to simplify their life both at home and at work. Stress is one of the biggest drivers of
depression. Less stress means less dog Make them a ditch the dog box. Encourage
them to fill it with favorite photographs, letters, anything that reminds them
of what’s good in their life. Include a “Dog Journal” Here they can
plot how they are feeling acknowledge progress, record the things
the are grateful for and set doable goals. Embracing the black
dog Agree to a course of action to get rid
of the Black Dog An ignored dog can become a big problem Learn about the condition together; knowledge is power and validation is a
great healer A united front is crucial in getting the
Black Dog to move on As a caregiver, compassion empathy and understanding are vital, but
recognize that you alone don’t have the power to rescue your loved
one. Professional help is often what’s needed Finding the right doctor can make all
the difference to a healthy recovery If they’re going to tell someone their
problems, it should be someone they respect and feel comfortable with. Don’t be
afraid to go for an initial assessment and don’t feel committed to continue if it
doesn’t feel right. ““You can also see a nurse, a counsellor or a health-care worker” If it suggested you take
anti-depressants do your research. Know the facts and ask
your doctor plenty of questions A big obstacle for seeking professional
help is the cost. Help them realize that the
cost of not getting the right help can be considerably higher: it can cost
marriages friendships jobs and even life itself Some simple rules of engagement and
agreement Agree that there is a Black Dog in the
midst and things may have to change
temporarily Agree that no one can help them until
they fully commit to helping themselves Agree to be gentle and respectful with one another during this time. Agree
to check-in with each other on a regular basis. Agree to communicate
honestly and openely. Agree to the course of
action set by the doctor and to review progress
regularly Self-preservation for the caregiver It can be difficult not to take anger,
criticism negativity and apathy personally. It’s
important not to buy into it accept that it’s the depression barking, not
the person you care for. Being overexposed to someone else’s
Black Dog can begin to rub off. Misery loves company so try not to get
sucked into the vortex It’s really important to recognize and
honor your own needs limitations and boundaries. Difficult situations a better dealt with
when you are calm and in the moment Yoga, meditation and mindfulness are great tools for achieving calmness and
control. Join a support group There’s nothing like being in a room
full of people who understand and share your story It’s important to get out and do your
own thing and be with friends. Friends may not be
able to solve your problems but they can offer incredible support,
comfort, wisdom and laughter. A Black Dog in any relationship can be confronting,
frightening and frustrating but navigated
together, the bond can become deeper richer and better for it. And
finally the most important aspect in this
tourney is to constantly remind each other it will pass it will pass it will pass If you have a Black Dog in your life, get
help, be helped and always hold onto hope.

100 comments

  1. When the father to my child died I went to the gym often.. It really helps even if its hard to understand.. So yes, exercise helps. 🙂 And seeing someone to talk to, I even had meetings when I cried out all the time.. I have a black dog, but his not a beast anymore! :3

  2. I've got a huge black dog.
    It's been with me most of my life.
    Unfortunately, these black dog videos will never make a difference, for me anyway. .
    Yes, these videos can highlight some of the feelings that are experienced, but they are not going to 'make it all better'.
    These videos are akin to teaching juniors to read & write while wrapping them up in cotton wool.

  3. Everything in the world is relative.

    If it's Empathy – look for a reason. Quiet life is heavens… you'll miss it.

  4. Life is full of stress, work being one of the main reasons for it. Long hours, social conflicts and low pay can make anyone depressed.  And I'm not sure how to combat this issue, I understand the need to work and make money for security.

  5. That piano tho. Calm and quiet, yes. Relaxing, maybe. 
    Piano music always use to darken/sadden my mood.

  6. I love the video and the message. Very well done. The only thing that I would change is the attitude about black dogs. I am concerned that it can teach the wrong message about how to treat dogs/animals. As a Mental Health practitioner, and animal advocate, I believe its important to teach compassion for all beings. Embracing the black dog and retraining it may be another way to get the message across without alienating any precious beings, and without portraying the message that we must shun depression. We want to heal it, yes. And we want to also access the value it has as well. That said, thank you for your dedication to helping those with depression, and for the well made video. I will surely use it as an education tool.

  7. And those of us who have let the black dog gnaw at all their friendships and relationships might as well go fuck themselves?

    this video is very insensitive towards the likes of me, if you ask me.

  8. What if this person doesn't want to be helped and is tired of helping herself and is afraid of change and feels like what makes her happy right now isn't enough and doesn't know what will make her happy than she is right now. My friend has depression and she doesn't want to live anymore. Feedback would be nice. Thank you

  9. Thank you for these two videos, Matthew and Ainsley. I think you may have saved me from a day of despair and perhaps from crushing my relationship yet again. You've reminded me of what I need to do… first, stop denying the dog's existence in my life; second, stop being ashamed; third, get out into the forest or play the piano or both. Bless you both.

  10. For some (me, for example), "It will pass" seems a hollow promise. Learning coping strategies is about as good as it gets.

  11. I had never heard of The Black Dog or Living with a Black Dog before this class.  These videos could help so many people, that I had to share.

  12. Lets be honest – wouldnt we all prefer a pill – that would end our lives in peace and without pain, without destroying our organs – so we could donate them. Wouldnt it be great that if after – like myself you ve had depression for 14 years – people stopped pretending and profiting from pretending that "everyone" can be cured! Right now I have 30 healthy organs I could give to save lives – a childs life – anyones life – someone who will actually want to live. I ve tried all this bull – and it doesn't work!! Maybe it does for some. I ve read up on why people think its not a good idea but their points are so pathetic compared to the pro's of why its a good idea. Freedom! release and peace X

  13. I'm brain washed by kind of depression feeling every day, every moment…
    But being a man, I feel embarrassed to seek help from the people I familiar with. When I talk to my gf about my true feeling, her response usually made me feel even worse. So sad and these made me to shut my mouth. What I can do is to pretend to be a happy person… sort of…

  14. This is wonderful. I have a friend who is going through their depression right now, and I fell like this is helping me prepare. I will definitely rewatch this soon. Thank you.

  15. I really need german subtitles.. I want to show this video to my mom because she doesn't know what she could do about my depression and i really can't eplain it to her. please!!!!! i need this! 🙂
    this video is so great!

  16. Sería importante que ésta versión lo tuvieran con audio latino. Lo menciono porque hay ocasiones en que algunas personas no alcanzan a leer. Yo trabajo en el área de promoción y prevención en Salud Mental en Jalisco, México. Muchas gracias @World Health Organization

  17. m scrolling through the comments to find something that touches me but none do. how am I supposed to battle the black dog on my own? what if i just want to surrender!

  18. In my opinion, as human being we have our own black dog which are our fear, negative thinkings and scary thoughts. The most important thing is that we'd better simplify it, live with it. We shouldn't build up the story or frame it. The more we think about that, the bigger the black dog. Just let the black dog go through your mind like some of clouds pass through the sky. That's it, nothing more, nothing less. That's the approriate method which I still apply in my life.

  19. I want to cry especially since Jonghyun died because of depression…his psychiatrist should've watch this video. RIP out bling bling Jonghyun

  20. I guess I am a little upset with this reference–ah if only I was a bit more literate and could know the meaning of Jonghyun's tattoo. Black Dog = Depression. Why it was not more known here?

  21. My maths teacher told me to watch the two black dog videos today. And it's just kinda hit me how much she actually realises what's going on without me even having said anything. I really needed this

  22. What if you have a physical illness that makes it impossible to consistently earn enough money to live on and you're getting further and further into debt, yet no financial support available, no support network and no social life due to depression, illness and lack of money, crippled confidence a completely broken sense of identity, no social skills, and a past that is too painful to bear despite having had professional help for over a decade… if you don't relate to this and you have even one of those things in place, I'm happy for you, sad that you have a black dog, but this viscous cycle has no 'exit' that I can see. If you have someone who loves you (not talking specifically a partner – a family would have been nice) who you love back that makes life worth something..

  23. this video needs more asian language captions because many asian countries still suppress talking about mental health and this would be life changing

  24. I've had many dark days these last few months, just watched the black dog video and I shall definitely take something from this and banish my black dog someday.

  25. You have a black dog. Then, may be, a day you realize that inside your black dog there is another black dog. And inside it there is another one… and inside it still another… and another… and so on. Then you understand than they are a multitude of black dogs nested. Don´t fight against them, its useless. Instead join them, make an army, lead it and go towards life to fight. Go and fight for freedom, for your own and intimate freedom, through the liberation of that multitude of prisoners that you recognize and mention only for their group name: "black dog". Sometimes, some persons suffering because of a black dog situation, succeed going on such strategy and get valuable successes. My case is one of those cases. Until now, at least. War continues.

  26. Depression is nothing like a black dog, Dogs are freindly, loyal and
    bring comfort, thanks to you bunch of cunts everytime i see a black dog i
    am now instantly reminded that I have mental health problems and it
    brings me down for the rest of the day. Whoever decided that this would
    be a good idea is an absolute cunt, Typical shit policys from a bunch
    of arseholse who know nothing about mental health,

  27. It's an attack on western psychology, western culture treats animals
    with respect and we regard dogs as our best friends, it's a pretty good
    chance you will see at least one black dog a day in Europe or America
    and they use this as a trigger, it's a subliminal implant that relapses
    your mental health problems and gives you a feeling of never being able
    to escape, leading to despair and eventually suicide.

    You will notice the majority of uploads for black dog on youtube are
    from asian and arabs, people who come from places where dogs are
    regarded as vermin and treated with no respect. They have taken
    something that is an intrinsic part of western life and used it to
    manipulate and alter our thought processes.

    in the UK alone suicides have skyrocketed bu no-one is really talking
    about it, it's no wonder when when we are being manipulated into
    thinking our best freind is following us around and is actually
    something bad. why do so mnay muslims go into pyschology only to mess
    with western folks by prescribing them medication that rots the brain
    and filling them full of this manipulaive programming propoganda
    bullshit?

  28. Depression in Europe and industrial nation is different than others, would y say its the same as africa?. There are all the monies in Europe but yet statiscally they have the highest rate of white dog depression and suicide. They judge the entire world ie the beautiful africa, the lovely india and asia with those patient people who suffered 300 years of white dog domination and colonialism with the same prospective as themselves.

  29. I say English speaking world is in economic crisis since 9/11. Every time their economic system gets into greedy mess they pose a world war to recover. this time WW111 was the proxy war thus has not got them out of the mess fully. This white dog it should be called is a new trend. study European history of the last 100 years and see trend after trend for yourself. the White dog has the international institutions including world health organisation under its thumb, i agree with white European having deeper psychological complications than a white dog but sorry dont apply it to the world. A young person in Iran who is born and lived under 40 years of embargo war and problem imposed by the white dog doesnt have the same depression as cocaine sniffers of BBC and England, no way.

  30. from 60s on wards it has been Financiers bankers lawyers and accountants have been milking England as the first guinee pig of Financial capital economy model and whomever country who followed England model. since 9/11 and new world order Psychiatrist are replacing lawyers and accountant to mild the system and get richer and fatter like their other white dog friends albeit in a different profession. white is white though.

  31. … AND HAVE YOUR BLOOD WORK DONE AND CHECK THE OUTCOME YOURSELF > MAINLY LOOK OUT FOR FERRITIN (IRON) AND VITAMIN B12, IF LOW CAN LEAD TO DEEP DEPRESSION, AS WELL AS A BAD GUT FLORA (SMALL VARIETY IN GUT BACTERIA CREATED BY TAKING TOO MANY ANTIBIOTICS! ) CAN BE THE REASON FOR YOUR DEPRESSION! LOVE AND HUGS KRISTINA P.S. MY DOCTOR HAS OVERLOOKED MY LOW FERRITIN AND B12 LONGER THAN 3 YEARS. I EVEN THOUGHT I HAD ADHD!

  32. Thank you for this video. When I saw the name of this video I was shocked and thought you saw the inside of my mind because the night before I tried to take my own life I actually saw a black hound and although I knew this was one of my hallucinations it scared me and I ran to my room crying uncontrollably. I will ensure my husband watches this video because I want him to understand what I am going through and also because I have shut him out for a longtime although I knew he deserved none of this. It is usally the people closest to us that are more affected by such situations as did my husband because at some point it starts to rub off on them too, not knowing how to deal with it. I love my husband and don't want him to suffer because of my black dog. All I want is my life back.

  33. I got this depression everyday for 10 years until now, please pray for me 🙁 . I know I am strong for staying alive this far but i don't know when will these all end 🙁

  34. I've been in a relationship with a person carrying the "black dog" for just over 3 months now. I must admit, it's been hard: I myself struggle with the feeling that I'm not loved by this person, and that they don't want to talk to me or spend time with me because they hate me. I've learned that that isn't the case: her depression is incredibly strong, she's had quite a rough life (she was adopted which contributed a lot to her depression.) In fact, it's her depression which has made her act in that way. I know she loves me, and to anyone else who's in a similar situation with their partner, people with depression need you the most, and they will remain loyal because you mean everything to them. That extra bit of help you give them is going to mean everything to them. The last point on this video is incredibly important: "don't give up".

  35. Depression is nothing like a black dog, Dogs are loyal freindly and loving. This is a an attempt to group think everybody with mental health problems instead of treating everybody like an individual. Black dogs are one of the most common things you see in the UK, running across the square in the opening scenes of eastenders, pubs everywhere, I see at least 2 or 3 black dogs a day in my life . This is just an attempt to subliminally implant a trigger into everyones heads. Every time you see a black dog you will be reminded of your mental health isuues as if they are genuinely following you. you will never be free. This is being pushed by people who have absolutely no idea what it nis like to have depression graduates who learnt everything they know from a text book with no real life understanding of mental health.

    By externalising your mental health issue, you are running away from it, mental health issues are not things that follow you outside of your body, this is simpply an attempt to dissasociate you from yourself, making it easier to manipulate you and trigger you off.

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